I was SUPER excited about NaNoWriMo this year because I was determined to actually do it and finish a 50,000 word novel in a month. Everything was pretty much set in place for me:
Interest in writing a novel? Check.
A few ideas? Check.
A reading/writing blog with tons of others who want to do the same thing? Check.
Actually telling people about my goal to write a book? Check.
With everything in place, I'm having a lot of trouble writing. Granted yesterday went a little better than Sunday, but I'm still pretty worried about the rest of the month.
I don't really have the time to commit to NaNo. I know, I know. If I don't have the time now, when am I going to have the time? But seriously, I'm going to school, running a student organization and going to San Diego this week. When I'm not trying to catch up on sleep, I'm writing a press release, or taking a midterm, or tutoring people at work. I do want to write a novel, but I want to do it on my own time.
Second, I'm having trouble with the whole deadline of a month thing. I know writing (and PR too!) is a very deadline-intensive field, but 30 days to write a 50,000 word novel is a bit absurd to me. I want to write (and I don't even care if I write crap the first time around) but forcing myself to sit down and write for 30 days straight even when I'm internally freaking out just isn't working for me.
Also, someone on my
Don't get me wrong. I LOVE writing. This is absolutely what I want to do in some capacity with my life. I'm just worried because as I started writing, I was realizing...wow, this is crap. Why does everyone tell me I'm such a good writer?
I know this is the first time I've ever attempted a novel, but still...I thought it would be a little easier than this.
Please reassure me that this is just happening because I'm nervous and because it's my first time. I'm so worried that I'm not going to be able to accomplish my dream of writing a book because I've just learned now that I suck. I know that writing a novel is hard. If it was easy, everyone would do it.
I know I have a story inside me. I know with the right amount of practice I can do it. I'm trying not to beat myself up over wanting to quit
I really don't have anything against NaNoWriMo. Actually, I think it's really awesome for people that it can work for. I don't even know if I'm going to give it up right now, but I'm going to try not to beat myself up if I do decide to leave my novel alone for the moment and re-visit it during winter break or a time that I can better dedicate myself to writing.
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8 comments:
I'm the same way with painting, I hate scheduling creativity. That's just not how my brain works! I took that painting class last semester and by the end of it, I HATED painting. I put all my stuff away in a closet and didn't look or think about it for months. And that made me really sad. I JUST got around to painting again, but it was when the mood just happened to strike. That's when I do my best work and I figure there's no sense in wasting my valuable time that could so obviously be spent doing other things that are stressing me out than making crappy art because I set aside a time to do it. Make sense? Hope my jumble of semi-nonsense helps.
Don't give up. It's not 50,000 words or fail. Can you imagine even just getting to the halfway point? That will be a major accomplishment. NaNoWriMo is a real challenge, but it's going to be really hard no matter what. This is not my first attempt at writing a novel and I still feel like most of what I write is crap.
Also, I'm almost certain it's physically impossible to write 50,000 words in one day, so I wouldn't pay attention to that person. The rest of us are struggling along like you. This isn't easy for anyone.
I start my NABloPsMo...
National Blog posting Month...
Girl, you have a TON on your plate. Seriously, you do.
This seems like a seriously stressful month to write a book.... but I can understand if you don't want to quit.
Don't stress about it. The book will come... the other stuff, it has to be done now.
I agree with Ashley, don't give up!
The 50,000 words thing is HUGE, especially for people with busy schedules. Why don't you just make your OWN goal of say, to write EVERY day and write at least 200 words a day? That way you're still making progress on your novel, you're still writing every day (which I think is extremely important when you're writing a novel) but you also don't have too much pressure on you!
Good luck!
I feel like if writing is something you enjoy, imposing a deadline and making it obligatory could take away from the pleasure you gain from writing. That's why I don't do the Noblopomo thing -- I like blogging and I think if I forced myself to do it every day I would start to resent it.
I wanted to do it too, but because I'm going on vacation, I think it might be a little hard....
I think of writing the same way i think of distance running - You're not going to get there on your first try.
It takes a lot of practice - and a lot of shorter steps and eventually lead up to the Whole Big Shebang.
Start with a goal of writing every day - with no big demands on how MUCH. Stretch your creative muscle, stretch your writing muscles, and once writing every day becomes the norm - THEN you'll be ready to write your novel!
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